Right now, I am writing on my phone lying on the couch. My hair looks like a mix between Loras Tyrell and Ross Poldark. I am mainlining caffeine. My children are lovingly screaming at each other like we’re at Lucifer’s Day Care for Misbehaving Children. I am season 7 Don Draper, no fucks left, and surviving by the grace of whoever is up there. Self care is literally the last thing on the agenda.
As I repeat the Mom mantra- this is just a season, this is just a season- I remind myself: This is okay.
It is okay that I am barely keeping it together.
It’s okay that I want to just lie on the couch after a morning of struggling through chores and dealing with children that were obviously given bath salts by someone.
It is okay that I am so so very grateful to be their mama, but also want to cry with frustration.
It’s okay that even though I just had a weekend away, I am already counting down to our Key West trip in May.
It is okay.
We don’t give ourselves nearly enough grace as parents. We build this image in our head of how things are supposed to be. As much as we love our parents, we always strive to be better, and make a better life for our kids than we ever had. We convince ourselves that everyday is going to be Pinterest perfect, and the house will be clean, and we’re gonna bake, and you won’t get toddler shit on your fingers, and you won’t be picking Goldfish out of your hair during nap time. Because of course they’re going to nap.
Listen, maybe 1 in 10 days are like that. But many times that is closer to 1 in 20, or 1 in 50, or 1 in 365, and we have to allow ourselves the same amount of love we give our children.
Would we tell our children they are screwing up?
Do we look at them with resentment because they do something less than perfectly?
Would we go a day without telling them we love them and they are enough?
Mamas, why do we do that to ourselves?
So, I am gonna go back to temporarily wallowing on the couch while the girls have a contest to see who can break one of their bones first. And I am going to tell myself that I am an okay mom.
I’ll leave a list of my favorite self care tips and I want you to commit to trying one today. Tell me in the comments which one you picked!
Ideas for self care
- Bubble bath
- 30 minutes on the treadmill or lifting weights
- Reading a good book
- Watching an episode of your favorite show
- Listening to a podcast you love while you fold clothes
- Making a list of your dreams and goals
- Going outside and getting 10 minutes of fresh air
- Doing a crossword or logic puzzle